A Letter To My Suicidal Trendsetter

I was you. I struggled with the same feelings you have. I fought some of the same internal battles you are fighting. And truthfully, some days the battle still continues. Quite so, most people still have those struggles. The problem is people like us will not admit it. Why? You are afraid people will downplay your feelings, correct? From other’s viewpoint, you have nothing to be upset about. Maybe you’re a straight A/B student with a guaranteed scholarship. Maybe you’re the first person in your family to successfully start a business. Or maybe everyone expects you to be a psychiatrist one day because you are so good at giving sound advice. Who knows. But whatever the reason, you are seen in a certain way by the public. And it’s intimidating thinking about possibly ruining others’ view of you. What if you tell your best friend you don’t think life is worth it anymore? Will she ever trust your words again? What if you told your business friends you’re mentally fighting to stay alive. Will they just shrug it off? Thinking money should fix your problems? I don’t know. Truthfully, some may back away. But don’t freak out! That is completely fine. Situations like this show people’s true colors. It shows who you should and SHOULD not take with you to greater levels. It shows who’s just using you and who really cares about your well-being. Not too long ago I was in the same predicament. I wanted to give up, but I had a following who expected me to stay strong for them. Yeah, I was an early graduate with two books written by 16, but that didn’t fix the many other problems going on. Would the speaking engagements stop? Would the friends who thought I was “perfect” (yes, a few assumed that) cut me off? And yes, some did. Some people couldn’t let the strong friend being weak for once, so they left. And honestly, that was the best thing that ever happened to me. So yeah, I understand. I understand trying to explain, “I’m not being fake! Everything I say on that stage is real! I’m still the trailblazer I was before!”, but no one understanding we also have moments of weakness. Trust me, I get. But let me tell you something. You have TOO MUCH greatness inside of you to give up. Right now, I can imagine life looks like a pile of trash in your eyesight. But that’s okay. Some times things get junky. So do we leave it there and cave in? No. We clean it up, little by little. We put ourselves back together piece by piece. You have worked too hard to let the Devil mess things up for you. Do not think low of yourself. You are still the million-dollar master-mind you were a few months ago. You’re the strong person your friends know you as. How do I know? Because most people would’ve given up by now, but you didn’t. You wanted to surrender to your evil thoughts, but you didn’t. Yes, you’re struggling, but you’re STILL fighting. You know things are going to get better. You know you have a billion-dollar idea that will change the world. You know ending your life isn’t the answer…so you haven’t. And I am VERY proud of you for that. It takes a lot of strength to fight those inner demons. So what do you do now? Here are a few tips

  1. Maybe you’re overwhelmed and can’t think clearly. Take some time off just for yourself. The other stuff can wait.
  2. Find a mentor/coach. If you’re used to being the strong one, you’ll forget you need help too. you can’t pour from an empty cup.
  3. Find likeminded people. People like you can identify with your struggles. They can give the moral support you need.
  4. Listen to motivational videos and testimonies. Nothing inspires you like people who have been in your shoes and still succeeded.
  5. Pray. God understands our pain. But he can’t force us to let him help. Have a conversation with him, he’ll be glad to listen.
  6. Go see a psychiatrist or Christian counselor. There is NO shame in that. Our pride will kill us. Don’t let it kill you.

Remember two things: One, don’t be afraid to be open. Your followers will appreciate your transparency. No one likes an unrelatable “perfect angel”. Two, you are tough. People who are dealing with depression, mental illness, or suicidal thoughts are underestimated. It’s easy to be productive when you’re happy, not so much when you’re not. Despite your mental health, YOU STILL get on that stage. Despite your suicidal thoughts, you STILL talk to your mentees about their problems for 2 hours. You fight every single day and wake up knowing you’ll have to do it all over again. That’s commendable in my book. You are TRULY a trendsetter. Keep fighting, we got your back.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

Is this an emergency? Please call 911 or the local emergency number for your area. 

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chante' whisonant

chante' whisonant

Chante' Whisonant is a published author, public speaker, mentor, Vice President of MBROC, and Founder of Chante' Whisonant, Inc.

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